Mean Jean: Amateur Dominatrix

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As someone who’s pretty out in her personal life, I act as a go-to person for people who want to get in to the work. ThosewomenmakemethesamesortofsickIfeelwhenIthinkofanyotherabsoluteandunjustifiedpower,butaseverwiththesesortsofthingsit'salsokindofhot,andsocietysaysemotionalabuseofmendoesn'treallyexistsoyoucanbeevilwithoutcensureandhavethemostsadisticfunofyourlife. Shetakespreciouslittleinterestinmeatall,andwhensheinformedthatshewasgoingtoshareapartofherlifethatshehasn'tsharedwith anyoneyet,I assumedIwasmakingsomeprogresstowardsanormalrelationshipwithher. Sometimes me and the massage girls I know get into joking fights like that—”You’re so lucky, you don’t really have to touch the clients!

Sexisn'tallhappy-clappy,especiallynotkinkysex,itusuallyconsistsintheexpressioninasandboxofasociallyrepresseddrivetodoevilorcommittransgression,whichallofushave. Many dommes begin in a house to get a feel for the profession and build their skill/clientele base, often working as a submissive before they move “up” to switch or straight domme. Butasthedominantpartyitisthetacitanddecidedlyunsexyresponsibilityofthewomantoensuresheisn'tcompletelyruiningsomeone'slifeandinfactIdon'tthinkthere'smuchsenseofthisaccountabilitywithinthescene,whichisjustifiedwithsimplisticfree-marketarguments.Several also did “foot parties,” which is a set up where a lot of foot fetish enthusiasts and ladies with nice feet meet in a very formal way, usually at a club or bar, to mingle with the hoped-for outcome of “mini foot sessions. Hello, I don’t even know you, Betty Wantstodom, and since you have even less investment in me as a person you are that much more likely to out me to someone I didn’t want to be outed to or turn me into cheap gossip. As a side note, I can’t tell you how irritating it is when someone I am out to refers someone I have never met to me for questions. Remember earlier, how I said that I was lucky to have a partner who didn’t fetishize me or demonize me for what I do?

This is not main characteristic of my personality or sexual preferences, this is just a role I like to try on when I am in mood, just a performance to explore my own self. Shehasnoshameatallindescribingwhatsheisdoingwithallthismoneythatishandedtoher,andsheregularlytormentsmensheassuresmeare"lonely,no-life,uglylosers"abouthowsheislivingthe"partygirllifestyle". Theuseofwordslike"evil"and"sadistic"werenotmeanttobemoralisingbutanin-universeperspective,clearlythetransgressivityoftheiractionsiswherethethrilllies. Shesaidthemenwouldremainaddictedtohermoreeasilyiftheywerepermittedtojealously,agonizinglyandfrustratinglywitnessussharedeep,passionateandlongfrenchkissesonwebcam. As for when I got into it for serious, I was going to school and working at a “feminist sex boutique” and since the pay was sh*t (hey, dildo retail is still retail!Rate how happy you are with what you do out of 100 (100 being the best, 0 being devastatingly awful) on an average day. I’ve seen dommes whose partners are completely clueless about what they do but are planning on telling them, some that are planning on never telling them, dommes whose partners only want to know the basic details, dommes who have agreements with their partners on what they can and can’t do at work, dommes that work with their partners, dommes that can’t find a partner because of what they do, dommes that get dumped when their partners find out about what they do, dommes who have to stop working to save a relationship, and dommes who may date or marry a client—although that’s very, very, very rare! I want to emphasize that my background and my experiences in sex work are really, really individual: I am someone who has never gone hungry or had to worry about getting her children taken away from her or felt coerced because she had no other options.

A lot of the real “perks” come in as you get more experience and build up a clientele base—this takes, of course, an enormous investment of time and money. There are independent dommes who rent space from houses, and house dommes that work independently on the side, domme co-ops, etc.I really love the actual work most of the time, especially when there’s enough chemistry to keep things moving. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Cookie preferences, as described in the Cookie notice.