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universal, I thought everybody experienced what I was experiencing. Much later, when I was around thirty and began to talk about it, I was very surprised to discover that my childhood experiences were completely out of the ordinary. Am transformat fericirea într-un scop când ea este, de fapt, doar o emoție - și chiar una trecătoare. Atât de atașate am devenit de ideea de a fi fericite, încât aspirăm prostește ca fericirea să fie un obiectiv permanent. În acest sens, ne așteptăm în mod inconștient ca viața să continue să producă stări de fericire. Când viața se conformează, ne simțim norocoase și binecuvântate. Însă când nu se mai întâmplă asta, ne simțim oprimate și nefericite. Dăm vina pe viață când, de fapt, ar trebui să dăm vina pe așteptările noastre prostești. As long as fear eclipses the language of our soul, we continue to be puppets to external forces. Under the tutelage of fear, our ego performs like an automaton. Robotically reactive, we become a slave to fear in its many forms: GF: Isn’t the first step, then, the most urgent, to become normal, to eradicate in oneself the functions that corrupt the dream?
So great is our thirst to be seen and validated by our parents and our culture that we succumb to the ego’s powerful and instinctive lure, slowly burying our authentic nature in the process. The result is a false identity, which we now present to the world. We think it’s who we are, but it’s really only a facade we wear to ward off the fear that we are unworthy and unlovable. In the Fog SJ: First of all, it’s necessary to grasp that the awakening comes first in relation to the ecstatic and legitimate effects it induces. The supreme knowledge is of a radically different essence than the ecstasies and other extraordinary joys it’s likely to induce. It would be dangerous to concentrate on the ecstasies. SJ: There is certainly a union of the subject and the object but they do not “fuse,” they do not disappear in some kind of undistinguishable magma. What’s miraculous in these experiences is that, without in the least losing my identity, in legitimately remaining who I am, I become the table, the stove, or the mountain, or the entire landscape, which, in turn, remains integrally itself. A remains A, B remains B, and yet A is in the heart of B, B in the heart of A. If both terms cancelled out each other’s original nature in this fusion, there would be no miracle, there wouldn’t be anything at all. This point seems important to me to the extent that, ordinarily, I find it poorly understood. If one believes what one reads or hears, if John becomes the tree, the tree, such as it is, is consumed, as is John. SJ: The moments were very different. Let me make one thing clear: the content of the awakening is one and indivisible. The original illumination diversified itself little by little without its oneness being challenged. As to these “moments” or “privileged instants,” their content can be extremely diverse. Let’s say that they always appear in the form of an abrupt and totally unexpected rupture. You can’t prepare yourself for one; they hit you on the noggin without a word of warning. I've been waking up since my young years, had sensitivities I didn't understand, and tried to "fit in" to a world that was trying to make me something that was unfamiliar to me. I revolted at every turn to NOT be what the world wanted me to be. My parents were asleep at the wheel, suffering themselves- German Air Force pilot officer perfectionist alcoholic dad and co-dependent pleasing military officer mom. God love them; they were born in a WWII Germany in the early 1940s. I inherited that stuff. We all inherit our ancestors' stuff....and this book shows you how to stop the perpetuation.
Dr Shefali's latest book is a powerful call for women to divest themselves of their patriarchy-imposed roles of automatic and compulsive caregivers at the cost of their physical health, emotional freedom, and spiritual awareness. one of the characteristics of my dream is to be extremely pragmatic: when I want to kill a fly, I grab a newspaper and swat it. Most people act that way, you say. As to material things, yes, but not when it concerns the spiritual. By that, I mean that when they encounter the “illusion,” they try to suppress the “Illusion,” in general, rather than confront themselves with their illusion. It’s like trying to liquidate the entire species of flies when swatting the one that’s bothering you. In short, I came to grips with my problem in a practical manner. “I think, therefore I am”: instead of examining the question of “Being,” “Thought,” and their relationships, I made myself the subject of the sentence, referring to the living reality of these words in me. I tried to grasp that formula, not intellectually, but with my very life. I pursued this effort for half an hour, an hour, until exhaustion. My intellectual faculties cried for mercy, I felt as if I were dragging myself along on bloodied knees and said to myself, “You’re crazy! Give it up! In the state you’re in, you don’t have the slightest chance of penetrating the mystery of that sentence.” If our parents admonished us for being too emotional or too this or too that, many of us immediately reacted to their injunctions in some rapid-fire way, adjusting our temperaments to match their standards. As happened with Trista, the ego becomes our armor, our protector, helping us adjust to a misaligned childhood.
The birthplace of the ego is self-abnegation. It thrives when the inner self is ignored, denied, suppressed, and all but annihilated in favor of a force on the outside—typically the voice of others, especially our loved ones, the culture in which we are raised, or a system of beliefs that captures our imagination. It took me a long time to realize the difference between taking on blame versus taking on responsibility. Whereas blaming myself kept me mired in fear, accompanied by my silence and complicity, taking responsibility allowed me to see my participation in my own victimization and rise up with courage and daring. When we give into culture’s manipulation, playing safe and playing small, the patriarchy stays in power. The antidote to culture’s suppression is a daring rebellion against silence. There is no nobility in suppressing and abnegating our voice. Such oppression doesn’t do anyone any good. It simply encourages and upholds the dominance of the patriarchy.A Radical Awakening will be of great help to anyone who is ready to transcend the limitations of their personal as well as cultural conditioning and awaken to their true nature as the eternal presence of consciousness itself. Dr. Shefali’s latest book is a powerful call for women to divest themselves of their patriarchy-imposed roles of automatic and compulsive caregivers at the cost of their physical health, emotional freedom, and spiritual awareness.” GABOR MATé We don’t want to see how burying our truth is an act of war against ourselves, but it very much is. Unless we recognize this, we will keep doing it to ourselves. When we allow toxicity to exist for the sake of peace, we are actually perpetuating war. There is no real peace where there is no authenticity. Lasting peace only emerges from an honest acceptance of oneself and one’s life experiences. Let me illustrate how this happens. Trista, one of my clients, remembers being around four years old when she broke her favorite toy—a doll she had named after herself and took care of like it was her little baby. Heartbroken, she recalls crying for hours. Her father, a strict disciplinarian, told her to stop crying or else she would get a spanking. This made her cry even more.
Yet, I did persist beyond good sense, showing a considerable aptitude for folly. Nevertheless, it would appear that this inner capacity to drive myself on like a madman was not without its virtues, for, all of a sudden, everything exploded. How can I describe the sudden nature, the total abruptness of the “event”? I detest using the word “supernatural,” but it’s the only one I can find that properly describes the suddenness of the awakening. With indescribable rapidity, I passed through to the other side of the mirror and found myself waking to an infinite wakefulness in my very center, in the center of that wakefulness which, itself, wasn’t an object but an intemporal act I was able to perform. I knew that I knew all there was to be known, that I had attained the infinite value, touched the essence of the essence of all things and of myself. . . I knew. Așa cum cuvintele pot vindeca, ele pot și umili. În cele din urmă, cuvintele pe care ni le spunem noi însene sunt singurele care contează. Vor exista întotdeauna cei din afară care se folosesc de cuvinte pentru a ne face să ne simțim rușinate. Când se întâmplă acest lucru, deși este dificil, trebuie să facem un pas în spate și să ne dăm seama că fac asta din propria lor nesiguranță. Acestea fiind spuse, uneori, dacă cineva spune că suntem grase, trebuie să facem o pauză înainte de a reacționa ca și cum am fi fost jignite. Și ce dacă suntem grase? De exemplu, dacă cineva mi-ar spune că am celulită, aș considera că este o umilire sau adevărul? Adevărul este că am celulită. Și acum ce? Mă supără acest fapt și mi-e rușine de el? Sau îl văd ca pe un fapt neutru și merg mai departe? Înțelegi ce zic? Cultura ne face să ne simțim prost dacă avem celulită sau suntem grase ca și cum ar fi lucruri rele, când, de fapt, ele sunt perfect naturale. Cultura face acest lucru cu aproape fiecare parte a corpului nostru care nu se potrivește standardului de frumusețe occidentalizat și „albit”.” Also, the entire book is about dismantling self-constructed egos and the effects female biology and female social conditioning have on all women, but then goes on to validate made-up gender identities like "gender-fluid" and she doesn't seem to see the complete and utter hypocrisy. She even says gender is a construct and part of the ego (which we are supposedly dismantling in this book) then says she validates personal gender identities, as though they're above scrutiny and can't be examined. This is where I stopped reading and realized she's just as mired in her ego as everyone else. She felt the need to virtue-signal to appease the gender trend. Absolute hypocrisy. A Radical Awakening lays out a path for women to heal their psychic wounds and prepares them to discover their own powers to help heal others and the planet. Dr Shefali helps women uncover the purpose that already exists within them and harness the power of authenticity in every area of their lives.
Dr. Shefali
Fear is the ruling emotion in our fogged-up state. Because we live in fear, we don’t call out the toxicity for what it is. Fear is followed by blame, topped off by shame for feeling such fears and not taking action against them. I saw this cycle of fear–blame–shame in my own life. Each time I didn’t stand up for myself out of fear, I beat myself up for days afterward. It was only when I could own my fear that I began to awaken.
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