Spare: by Prince Harry, The Duke of Sussex

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Later, his girlfriends were followed by the press and then there was his life with Meghan when he was finally happy. He was told that it will be difficult for her. Yet, the press wanted him to be married. Most of us know he ended up leaving his beloved country to find a better life. I’m in a minority here on GR, by rating this a ‘1’ because most people I know who have a problem with Harry’s behaviour, integrity, and motives for writing this book have chosen not to waste their money or time on it. Which potentially provides a distorted view of UK public opinion, in particular. This was a disappointing read that left me feeling decidedly worse about the toxicity of the royal family and bleak about any hopes of improvement. It might be worth a read for someone interested in the 'drama' of the royals, but anyone hoping for a decent piece of writing should look elsewhere. He lets himself off the hook for his Pakistani slur because he grew up sheltered and his one Pakistani friend forgave him. This book was revealing, but also frustrating. Harry spares no punches rightfully pointing out where others have done wrong. However, he fails to consistently apply this same critical eye to his own actions. While he sounds like he feels bad for his missteps, he attributes them entirely to his upbringing with little interrogation. For example:

Immense detail is given to several, seemingly unimportant events. The appearance of rooms, for example, are described wonderfully (much as Harry said they would be, given how his memory works). Quite unfortunately, this measured and careful writing does not extend to some of the more sensitive topics. He gives a couple 'lip service' passages to the evils of colonialism, but overall, he's a proud Brit and a monarchist. Harry’s experience as a young child/person show the struggles he had with sharing his feelings and that as he matured and started that self-work, he was able to change how he showed up in relationships, how he showed up in his work. I saw a recent headline that was something to the effect of “Harry caught in cult of psychotherapy.” Harry obviously believes in therapy, believe in improving oneself and learning (as I believe there is evidence of), and if other members of their families do not or do on a surface level, then it is easy to see/understand how the rifts have continued to grow. Meg and Charles seem to get along well. Wills is put off Meg hugged him and didn't bow. Kate is unbalanced by Meg's Americanness.

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Unfortunately one of my biggest issues with this book is its credibility. Is the book to explain the narrative? or is the narrative being written to suit and sell a book and his story now?. Had Harry come out at the beginning and stated his case or even hinted at the hurtful and damming accusations he is now making about his family. Had we been given a glimpse of this story he is now pedalling, (with the exception of the media) then the book might have felt more credible, his version more believable. Instead, it feels like it is only after his proposals to become a part time Royal were rejected that he has decided to be angry with his family so much so that he needs to tell the world about it. You would want out of this situation altogether if all this were true - not negotiate a different ‘Royal’ role that would allow you to pursue the celebrity lifestyle and fame that this couple appear to crave. I know what I think but it is up to you to draw your own conclusions. Even my father reminds me that unfortunately Willy and I can’t be normal…in which normal events were treated as abnormal, and the abnormal was routinely normalized.” There are some funny slightly awkward stories he included that made me laugh and I loved that because we see that playful nerdy side of Harry in his interviews as well. Original review (1/11/2023): I felt as though I was reading a long letter from a friend. Harry shares his life, experiences, thoughts and feelings openly and compassionately. He tells it like it is—doesn’t sugarcoat and yet consistently expresses his wish for things to be different than they are. He calls out familial poor behavior as kindly and compassionately as possible while being firm and extending more grace than what is likely deserved. Next to Harry, Prince Andrew gets the kindest treatment of the royals, being referred to only as "embarrassing"(he sounds more upset about Kate asking Meg to apologize for the baby brain comment). I didn't expect something earthshattering, particularly given his friendship with Eugenie, but I think Andrew's actions merit a bit of a harsher adjective than "embarrassing"

In its current state it's nothing but yet another slap in the face to those "others" to whom he, the Royals, the UK, and the rest of the Western war-criminals have caused immense pain and suffering with impunity. Harry's former girlfriends (and, indeed, his wife) are given bland, two dimensional descriptions. All of them are described not by who they are or what they stand for, but by what they have offeres Harry. Yes, he does say they are smart or funny, but their entire personalities are boiled down to syrup. Putting my own personal thoughts on the monarchy aside, (and the fact that I'm nosy), Prince Harry's "controversial" and "highly anticipated" memoir, Spare, portrays himself as a person, who is breaking generational trauma and a toxic family dynamic (because they should "never complain, never explain"). The brothers also weren't each others best men at their respective weddings, just more lies for the press.I can't understand why so many are hating on this book. I found it fascinating. If for nothing else, it gives first person insight into an insular (and quite drafty) institution. I found Prince Harry to be quite caring and insightful. Yes, I realize it's his story told by him via professionals who are hired to portray him in the best light. But, who can possibly imagine a lifetime under such scrutiny. He was born into a life he didn't ask for, doesn't want, and a life he can never truly escape. As everyone knows Harry lost his mother when he was young. Yet so did his brother William. It is quite clear throughout Harry's storytelling that William cares about him a great deal and is worried about him and wanting to get him help. William can obviously see he is going the same way as his mother did (paranoid). Notice how he uses the words "take" and "remove" instead of "kill" or "murder" when describing his own actions. Contrastingly, he has no problem referring to the people he shot as "killers".

Harry seeks compassion and understanding from everyone, but did he (or will he) show any to the people whose lives he destroyed? Of course not; they are, after all, just "bad people" doing "bad things". Through the first third of the book, I felt that advanced leaks from the memoir were taken out of context and that his love of his father and brother shine through. By the end, it is clear that love is still there and strong, despite the gloves being off, but that Harry is choosing to protect his own family (his wife and children) in a way that he was never chosen and protected. (These warm fuzzies do *not* extend all the way to Camilla.) Some have defended Harry by saying "at least it's good that he owns up to it" and "he seems to have learned from it".

Toys

The little insights were truly interesting and just written as if everyone is bathed by other people, we all walk by our father's room as he's being dressed by his valet, or bagpipes are played at the request of our grandmother. Such a different life! Harry has undertaken a number of interviews to promote his memoir, mainly in the U.S. and will appear on Tuesday's episode of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert at 11:35 p.m. ET.